Phriday Phunn Quizz: Thursday Edition

Due to the holiday, we are presenting the Phriday Phunn Quizz a whole day early. I'm keeping busy by making two batches of ice cream for various social events we're attending, which after a few weeks of railing about sugar, and starting to rail about giving sweets to kids, makes me a big fat hypocrite the life of the party. Guess right and you'll enter the kingdom of heaven, but guess wrong and see how the kids around me will be after eating my ice cream.

This is the face of:

1. a pre-diabetic
2. Satan
3. a generation that grew up on much smaller portions
4. corporate imagineering

Family values include:

1. food and fun
2. lots of cheesecake
3. free-market Jesus
4. a super-sized combo bucket for $2.99

Well be back on Tuesday, with the monthly weigh-in and the state of the lard.

THE COUNT: 2230
A day out with Edie, kept to the budget. Lunch up with Grandma's on the UES at her favorite pizza joint. The house salad wasn't that great, and the dressing on the side that came with it was just vegetable oil with some dried herbs in it. I was given two containers, and I looked at the bottom - 2oz. That's four tablespoons, which is....400 calories of oil. And I was given two -- 800 calories of dressing. I poured one of them over the salad, but it could not hide the fact that was not that fresh, and I only ate half, with a lot of oil pooling on the bottom.

AM SNACK: 7:45am, iced green tea, 25 cal

BREAKFAST: 8:30am, steel cut oatmeal, 375 cal

AM SNACK: 12pm, momma salad, 100 cal

LUNCH: 2:30pm, 2 slices pizza, house salad, diet coke, +/- 1000 cal

DINNER: 7:45pm, sardines & avocado on whole wheat toast, steamed string beans, baked red potatoes, 7oz diet sprite, 730 cal

Phriday Phun Quizz: More Sugah, honey!

Friday once again! Takin' the fambly out for an end of summer weekend away, so we'll continue to report from my stomach on Tuesday. Leaving in the morning, so I'm going to just try to aim to go to bed slightly hungry without recording the calories.

Here lies the Phriday Phun Quizz. Guess right and be rewarded by our Father Art, who is in heaven. Guess wrong and see what is wrong with them kids today.

Chris Crocker wants you to:

1. leave Big Food alone.
2. eat more sugar and grow up big and strong just like him.
3. buy his new porn video.
4. use him in a meme, any ol' meme.

This is an example of:

1. The Nanny State
2. Truth in Advertising
3. All of the above
4. None of the above

Paula Deen has got:

1. the Buttah
2. the Sugah
3. the Fattyfat
4. the chachas

These drinks represent:

1. the mixture of alcohol and sugar
2. drinks for children
3. crimes against civilized culture
4. dinner at Sigma Kappa Alpha

Phriday Phun Quizz, Sweeeet Edition

"Crank Up Hunger" would be more precise.

Woke up at 5am, road the bike deep into Rockland Country, then came back, tallying about 105 miles. I was trying to eat conservatively but with an eye to keep moving, but I still came to the edge of  "bonk" while returning via the West Side bike path.

In endurance sports such as cycling and running, hitting the wall or the bonk describes a condition caused by the depletion of glycogen stores in the liver and muscles, which manifests itself by sudden fatigue and loss of energy. Milder instances can be remedied by brief rest and the ingestion of food or drinks containing carbohydrates. 

I tried to stay away from too much sugar (which is good for quick energy) and use some longer lasting fats and starches, but when I was bonking, the sugary Gatorade brought me back in 10 minutes or so. Lovely sugar.

My calorie-counting cyclometer credited me more than a full day's calorie budget, and took full advantage with a day of pizza, Chinese, hot dogs and crap. Gotta live!

For those new to FBIWC, the Phriday Phun Quizz is a direct rip off loving tribute to my favorite bike blog, Bikesnob NYC. Enjoy you quiz: get it right and see a nice young scientist tell you why we love sugar, but be careful, if you click and get it wrong, you'll see a kid who has bigger worries than just too much sugar.

Fat kids are to cake as:

1. Fitty Cent is to video models.
2. Republicans are to repealing the social safety net.
3. Monkeys are to hurling poop.
4. mutant zombie cakes are to fat kids.

That girl is:

1. Poison
2. Sugar
3. High Fructose Corn Syrup
4. All of the above

One hit is all it takes to:

1. get addicted.
2. be incredibly cheesy.
3. get addicted to cheese.
4. be liable for assault & battery.

This woman is:

1. addicted to donuts.
2. cocaine-addled.
3. the life of the donut party.
4. all of the above.

TOTAL CONSUMED:4245
BIKE CREDIT: - 2444
THE COUNT: 1800

BREAKFAST: 4:45am, whole wheat pancakes, banana, iced tea, 430 cal

BIKE SNACK: 7:15am, clif bar, 240 cal

BIKE SNACK: 8:15am, whole wheat bagel with creamcheese, gatorade, 530 cal

BIKE SNACK: 11:15am, fritos, gatorade, chocolate chip cookies, 615 cal

BIKE SNACK: 1:30pm, slice of pizza, 20oz diet coke, +/- 300 cal

BIKE SNACK: 4:45pm hot dog, gatorade, +/- 380 cal

PM SNACK: 6pm, 8oz chocolate milk, 250 cal

DINNER: 8pm, chicken & broc, por fried rice, egg roll, wonton soup, 14oz diet sprite, +/- 1,500

Phriday Phun Quizz

This hamster's wife just went away for the weekend, leaving him with the kids.

It's Phriday! Gotta get down on Phriday. Horrible weather, no riding, ate too much, wah wah wah. B is going away to Boston for the weekend, got the kiddles all to myself, wonder how it'll impact my eating. Should I just unhinge my jaw now and pour in the ice cream, and hope that keeps me sane?

Well, I gotta go run and start building the couch fortress I'll be hiding in all weekend. Guess correctly and see a man fed up with McDonalds and not taking it any more. Guess wrong and see the same guy showing his true American stripes...

This man's hair style is called a:

1. Comb Over
2. Side C
3. tip of the sexual mountain
4. Horizontal Mullet

This bag of fritos:

1. is a poorly executed Frito Pie
2. is an alien disguised as as Fritos
3. is a "marital aide."
4. is delicious, so shut up.

Oh no you:

1. Didn't
2. Did
3. Not Sure

This is an ad for:

1. a brand of bikini wax
2. an escort service's line of sunscreen
3. Brasil tourism
4. a sophisticated, full-bodied liquor that will go well with sex

THE COUNT: 3325
I think this is the first time I really broke my budget since restricting. I woke up at 4:30am with the intention of riding all day. Had a big breakfast, got on my gear and then just stood there. I realized I was NOT waking up, I was overtired, my brain was skipping gears and all I wanted to do was get back in bed. So I did. Used my solo day to plant myself in the movies for 5 hours, and packed healthy snacks. But because my schedule was interrupted and I felt oddly low-energy, I ended up busting my budget by a solid 1000 calories. I spent most of the day vaguely hungry until dinner, where grandma came over and wanted Chinese, not the most budget-friendly. I tempered it with a string bean dish, but let's get real, it was dense. And scarfing two ice cream sammies to just feel settled didn't help.

I'm not worried, I'm not falling off the wagon or losing enthusiasm. A touch of sickness, overtired, and ate breakfast waaaay too early.

BREAKFAST: 4:45am, toasted pumpernickel bagel & cream cheese, 7oz diet coke, 580 cal

AM SNACK: 8:30am, iced green tea, 25 cal

MOVIE SNACK 1: 10:30am, baby carrots, whole wheat pretzels, 340 cal

MOVIE SNACK 2: 12:30pm, almonds, 360 cal

LINNER: 3:45pm, hijiki tofu patty, large spinach salad with carrot dressing, water, +/- 500 cal

DINNER: 7pm, shrimp fried rice, string beans in brown sauce, wontons, a little veg lomein, water, diet sprite, +/- 1000 cal

EVENING SNACK: 8pm, 2 ice cream sandwiches, 520 cal

3325

Phriday Phun Quizz, Ghost Busters Edition

Fine, thanks for asking!

So! Two weeks in, how we doin'? I'm really enjoying this new format, after grinding out autopilot blog entries 7 days a week for five years. I'm spending a lot more time writing, and taking time to proof and rewrite, and actually doing research and linking things to support my opinions/question my assumptions. Before I wrote yesterday's entry on bariatric surgery, I was a lot more inclined to regard it as solution to the growing obesity crisis. After looking around, it certainly is not the answer.

And so the week ends. Here are a few questions to see if you were paying attention since Monday. Guess correctly and see a very convincing argument for bariatric surgery. Guess wrong and see an animated man get torn apart.

This is the blogger:

1. After a bike ride
2. Before a bike ride
3. During a bike ride
4. as he is when not bike riding

What kind of yoga does this lady practice?

1. Fartamukti
2. Mysorebutt
3. Asstangy
4. Fot Yoga

This is a fine example of:

1. Lap Band Surgery
2. Man-birth
3. Polish hemmeroids
4. diners at a vegan restaurant

Special vaguely NSFW Bonus Question:

"Sliming" is:

1. A side effect of lap band surgery
2. A side effect of Ghost Busting
3. A sub genre of Japanese porn
4. All of the above

INPUT:................4550

BIKE CREDIT: -2,200
THE COUNT:...2,350

Road about 90 miles up to Poughkeepsie this morning, left out at 4, got home by train around 6. Funny how the bike-fuel diet would be decimating if it were not matched with the calorie burning, but matched with the relatively strenuous task at hand, what would make me feel horrible sitting around makes me feel fantastic on the bike. Hmm, I think there's a blog post in that..

BREAKFAST: 3:15am, bagel and cream cheese, banana, 7oz diet coke, 650 cal

BIKE SNACK: 6:15am, trail mix, 620 cal

Made up of off-brand cheerios, dark chocolate chips, dry roasted peanuts, and salted almonds.

BIKE SNACK: 8am, Gatorade, 130 cal

BIKE SNACK: 10:15am, trail mix, 620 cal

BIKE SNACK: 11:30am, 32oz Gatorade, Fritos, Entemann's chocolate chip cookies, 1040 cal

BIKE SNACK: 3:30pm, coffee cake, 20oz diet coke, 260 cal

DINNER: 7pm, tofu satay, roti canai, Singapore rice noodles, +/- 1230 cal

Phriday Phun Quiz

I'm off to a wedding this weekend, so I'm going to skip the navel gazing deep into my belly insightful essay about food related matters and get right to the quiz. The wedding spot is actually out of cell reception, so food diary will be updated next week.

So. Look upon these questions. Click the right answer and be rewarded with the gift of bacon. Click the wrong answer, however, and be punished with the curse of bacon.

I'm too phat for yo stupid damn question.

Who is the best overweight rapper?

1. Pig Pun
2. Heavy D & the Boyz
3. the Fat Boys
4. Large Marge

This man is trying to:

1. Celebrate his wedding in the traditional style
2. create an internet meme
3. scrape cake-bits out of his bride's mouth
4. share his love of cake, delicious caaaake!

To my health?

Diet Coke is to Coke as:

1. soy chicken is to steak
2. Coldplay is to Radiohead
3. deeerp is to D'oh!
4. Bud Lite is to a kick in the nuts

The Frito Bandito:

1. THAT'S RACIST!
2. THAT'S DELICIOUS!!
3. THAT'S CARTOONISH!!!
4. THAT'S ALL OF THE ABOVE!!!!

Broiled Sole Soil

The author of this blog:

1. eats broiled soil.
2. needs to proof better.
3. wishes a reader caught it.
4. wishes for a reader.

Everyone likes Phun, right?

Five more calories and I could have eaten a Devil Dog.

I rode my bike this morning to Coney Island in the rain. There were plenty of options to eat, particularly tempting was some breakfast hot dogs at Nathan's, but didn't want to squander the calorie credit I was building. I've been a relatively serious recreational/commuter/distance cyclist for about 12 years now, and one thing I've heard repeatedly from various friends is some version of:

"Wow, you ride you bicycle so much, and yet you're still a lard-ass!"

And it's true. I've ridden 100 mile rides weekly, I've gone cross country by bike, I've put a lot of time and energy into it and yet, I've been usually one of the fattest (and relatively slowest) riders on most organized rides I participate in. And it doesn't bother me, I'm not competitive and never really worried about what the next guy over thinks. Particularly if he's head to toe in neon spandex and wearing sunglasses like this:

After winning a stage in the Tour de France, Kenny F'ing Powers strode over to give his sample.

The thing about burning lots of calories quickly is you get ravenous. And my habits tend to be to eat more calories than I burn day-to-day, and when it comes to a 100 mile ride, it becomes even more exaggerated. One could say not only has bike riding propped up my weight, but encouraged me to get fatter.

So when I decided to start counting calories a few weeks ago, I knew I'd have to get a handle on the bike thing. I started with this calculator geared to bike activity, but it didn't feel right. So I bought a new cyclometer with calorie-expenditure measurement, and low and behold, it's measurements were tallying about half the calories of the online calculator. Bigger opportunity to eat, now a bigger opportunity to lose.

Speaking of bikes, one of my favorite blogs is Bikesnob NYC. I've met Mr. Snob and have had the privilege of spending some time with him, so I'm happy to totally rip him off flatter him with a tribute to his end of week quizzes, where he tests the patience deep knowledge of his readership. I shall call it the....

Phriday Phun Quiz

Gaze upon the questions below. Guess right and you will be laughed at by a fat baby. Guess wrong and you will go to jail, with out the bail, because you failed. Ready? Aim! What? Wait a sec! Oh.

It replaced the previous candy, Gone-O-Reyah

Which weight suppressant is the funniest?

1. Ayds
2. Xenical, a.k.a. the poop-yer-pants-pill
3. A punch in the face
4. Yo momma's cooking

Yo Momma in action.

Yo momma is so fat,:

1. she doesn't sit around the house, she sits AROUND the house.
2. she jumped up in the air and got stuck.
3. when she went out in a red dress, everyone yelled, "HEY KOOL-AID!"
4. her belly button has got an echo.

Have a good weekend, catch you next week!

BIKE CREDIT: 650 cal
THE COUNT: 2945 cal
Friday is not a normal day during the summer. B has summer Fridays, Baby Milli has a sitter, Toddler Edie is in day camp, and I get to ride my bike. Due to heavy weather, took a shorter morning ride out to Coney Island, then took out B to DUMBO for lunch to honor our wedding anniversary. The meal was big & heavy, I ordered salad with my burger, she ordered fries with hers, I ate half her fries, we went nuts for the occasion and ordered two slices o' pie, the same pie served at our wedding. In the evening, did yoga with the HVS (the Hungry Vegan Society, who will have her own post next week, if she allows me to talk about her here!) and then a movie. A chocolate thing at the cafe, popcorn in the the theater - no calorie counts, but portion wise, it was more of a meal than the snack it was supposed to be. I felt full after sitting through a 2 hour movie, so the calories must have been up there.

AM SNACK: 7:15am, iced green tea, 25 cal


BREAKFAST: 7:45am, 2 small whole wheat pancakes, 3 slices of bacon, 450 cal


BIKE SNACK: 11:30am, Gatorade, 130 cal


PM SNACK: 1pm, momma salad, 90 cal


LUNCH: 2:30pm, burger, salad, fries, apple pie, peanut butter pie, water, +/- 1250 cal


EVENING SNACK: 7:45pm, chocolate peanutbutter brownie thing, popcorn, diet coke, +/- 1000 cal