Big Pharma and Big Food: Conspiring to make you healthy or to get your money?

Make no mistake, there are already "death panels" here in the medical establishment of the United States, and it decides who lives and who dies by how much money they have. Sorry, that was supposed to be light-hearted!

There is a medical researcher employed by the Feds who is talking to reporters off-the-record,  casting aspersions on the government's "war against fat". Scientist X seems to think that the government's medical wing is acting in the interests of Big Pharma when they cancelled a study that was looking to see if altering diet and exercise could treat diabetes more effectively than traditional medical intervention. This is the master plan according to Scientist X:

• Step 1: Convince Americans that not being thin is a disease that needs to be cured.
• Step 2: Encourage the government to implement public health programs that, through lifestyle interventions, will purportedly make people thinner, and, by hypothesis, healthier.
• Step 3: Document the complete failure of these programs in the medical literature.
• Step 4:  Get the government to approve a host of new diet drugs, since it’s now been demonstrated that lifestyle interventions don’t do anything to help reverse this deadly epidemic.
• Step 5: Profit!

The study that was cancelled (after 11 years!) called losing only 5% of your body weight a success, so perhaps it did not push it's subjects hard enough or long enough, allowing for a certain conspiratorial thinking to lead to the conclusion that the government doesn't want people to be thin if it doesn't profit someone. (I suggested a few weeks ago that if the study showed that diet and exercise is as effective as taking meds, isn't that a success?) The study suggested that being fat is not the problem when it comes to health problems like diabetes, therefore contradicting Big Pharma's push to find profitable weight-loss drugs.

No need for a soda ban when you can buy a pill to lose the fat. Shut up and keep buying!

A blogatrix over at Jezebel has a pretty cutting addition to the doctor's suspicions:

You often hear anti-fat crusaders complaining that "fat people don't want to have an honest conversation about fat," while refusing to acknowledge things like multi-billion-dollar industries that market candy cereal to children and then diet pills to adults. Or the ways that a lifetime of consuming hyperrich foods (deliberately saturated with high fructose corn syrup thanks to federal subsidies) can literally change people's body chemistries and leave them largely powerless to maintain significant long term weight loss..... Or the fact that some people, regardless of lifestyle, are just fat. 

To willfully ignore all of those complicating factors means that you DON'T want to have an "honest conversation about fat"—you want to have a masturbatory conversation about your preconceived notions about fat people's self-control.

It's a big and complicated ball of wax, and western medical thinking tends to zero in on singular causes then look to eliminate them without disturbing the ecosystems around them, which is near impossible.  It becomes even less possible when entrenched interests in the reigning ecosystem prevents research from coming close to questioning the possibility of causes that would threaten profit-centers. Big Food & Big Soda, I'm looking at you.

Though on the surface I am eating less/doing more, I've also changed what I'm eating and what I'm doing. In changing the "whats", I've reallocated my grocery funds from more refined & sugary foods to less refined whole fruit and veg and whole grains, and my time and funds from hours and hours of expending calories to minutes and minutes of building muscle. (I'm also discovering that sugar addiction is real.)

Getting yourself right in terms of weight and health should cost you less in terms of expending money on food and exercise, and less on medical care and, cough cough, Big Pharma. I think there is a book in that assumption. For now, this blog post will have to do.

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We celebrated our youngest's first birthday on Saturday, centered around a side of salmon I cured over the week to put on bagels, and a big 3 layer white cake with sugary frosting and vanilla ice cream that I also made. The cake and ice cream was killer, one of those things that definitely benefit from my culinary training, but there was an odd juxtaposition. 

An actual photo, if you replace burger with cake and ice cream, and Paris Hilton with  me.

While I was shovelling in some cake and ice cream (hey, it was the weekend!), a friend of the family who I haven't seen in months and months made note of my weight loss, and said she thought she saw me in the park with my daughter from a distance, but who she saw was too thin to be me. It was me, yep. I wish I had the ability to not see myself for a few months, so I could appreciate how different I look. I still see a puffy fattish dude, but my belt size has shrunk and all my tight-clothes now fit well. I hope I ease up on myself in the next 10-20 lbs, or losing weight will be the least of my problems!

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DAILY AVERAGE: 2666
This week passed at a furious clip, trying to return to normalcy. Two things prevented that: now that our main supermarket is out of commission due to the storm, I've been buying at the local smaller, more expensive, less fresh market and it's bumming me out. On top of that, our baby sitter and her teenage daughter stayed with us for three days, as her home in the Rockaways sustained major damage and still has no power. To have her haul ass all the way here to help us out, it would be wrong to send her home to suffer through a Nor'easter in an unheated place. 

Eating was heavier than I would like, and only lifted weights once, as I was too beat up from pushing the bike through storms and snows to do a second lift.

MONDAY COUNT: 2870
Betsy back to work, Edie back to school, me back to...lifting weights, doing laundry, making proper food to eat, running chores, Milli Milling it up. Wholefoods on Houston is about 90% restocked, but the Pathmark I do the majority of my shopping is still has no power and is flooded.

Tried to have a good eating day, but got so hungry in the evening, just wore me down. Considered "cheating" and not reporting it, but that would be incredibly....lame. Just gotta give myself a pass and hope my will power helps me through tomorrow. It's not a war of individual days, but battle days that average out to a monthly war....

AM SNACK: 7:45am, iced green tea, 25 cal

BREAKFAST: 10am, steel cut oatmeal with butter, brown sugar, vanilla, cinnamon and salt, 375 cal

LUNCH: 12:15pm, sardine & avocado on whole wheat toast, baby carrots, 7oz diet coke, 580 cal
In the rush to restock from undersupplied stores, I picked up sardines packed in water instead of olive oil, and the avocado was waaaay too unripe. Still, it was nice to have a normal, healthy meal.

PM SNACK: 3:45pm, frozen chicken nuggets, 7oz diet sprite, 250 cal

DINNER: 6:45pm, teriyaki meatballs, roasted brussel sprouts, whole wheat cous cous, water, 1140 cal

EVENING SNACKS: 10-11pm, handful of pretzels, small bowl of chocolate chips & peanuts, 3 mini knishes, +/- 500 cal

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TUESDAY COUNT: 3025

Again, stress & tiredness came together in a tsunami of hunger at the end of the day, and I found myself eating half a pint of ice cream. Our childcare-giver lives in the Rockaways, and her home was wiped off the face of the earth. She made it in today with her teenage daughter, and me n' B immediately offered to let them stay with us for a few days. It's the right thing to do, but ice cream makes it a little easier, he he.

AM SNACK: 8am, iced green tea, 25 cal

BREAKFAST: 9:45am, smoothie, 350 cal

No pomegranate juice on hand, substituted whole milk. Bananas were very unripe due to the supply disruption, so the smoothie was oddly unsweet.

PM SNACK: 12:30pm, momma salad, 100 cal

LUNCH: 2:45pm, quarter pounder, fries, diet coke, 900 cal

DINNER pt 1: 6:30pm, slice of pizza, 7oz diet sprite, +/-250 cal

EVENING SNORT: 7:30pm, bourbon on ice, +/- 200 cal
Whiskey, when watered down a little, is delicious.

DINNER pt 2: 9pm, hijiki tofu patty, spinach salad, +/- 700 cal

EVENING SNACK: 10pm, ice cream, +/-500 cal

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WEDNESDAY COUNT: 2240

Made it to Red Hook to teach. The school is open, but also being used as a relief center, as the whole hood was underwater in the hurricane and parts of the neighborhood still doesn't have power. Had four students to cook with, pumped out about 150 meals to be distributed through a church tomorrow. Road the big bike home through the start of a Nor'easter, snow and wet and wind, was fine except on the Manhattan Bridge, had to walk over slowly.

Not the greatest eating day, but I was busy and was able to keep it relatively reasonable. A little left over ice cream snuck in at the end, hrumph.

AM SNACK: 8:45am, iced green tea, 25 cal

AM SNACK: 11:30am, momma salad, pickle, 115 cal

LUNCH: 12:15pm, whole wheat pasta with sauce and chicken sausage, 900 cal

SCHOOL SNACK: 4pm, brownie, +/- 300 cal

DINNER: 7:45pm, chicken marsala, rosemary potatoes, spinach with garlic, water, a little ice cream, +/- 900 cal

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THURSDAY COUNT: 3220

Woke up early and road a loaded cargo bike slowly over 14 miles to Queens Village in the remnants of a Nor'easter, where I was on my feet for most of 8 hours cooking knishes and cleaning dishes, followed by another 14 mile bike ride home in the dark loaded with knishes. I was invited to cook with friends catering a kosher event, so it was a good opportunity for experience. Sure, I ate over the budget, but when I passed out a little after 8pm, my body could have eaten more -- due to extra calories burned in a 30 mile bike ride, I think I accommodated it appropriately.

BREAKFAST: 5:30am, cornflakes and whole milk, a banana, handful of chocolate covered espresso beans, +/- 450cal

AM SNACK: 7:30am, sausage biscuit, hash brown, diet coke,  570 cal

LUNCH: 2pm, Indian food, +/- 1000 cal

PM SNACK: 5pm, 20oz diet ginger ale, 0 cal

DINNER: 6:30pm, 2 slices pizza, packaged pastra +/- 1000 cal

EVENING SNACK: 7:45pm, ca taste of pie & ice cream, +/- 200cal

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FRIDAY COUNT: 1975

Must have been a calorie hangover, as it was almost accidental how low I came in today.

AM SNACK: 3:30am, iced green tea, 25 cal

BREAKFAST: 10:15am, Fage full fat yogurt with honey, vanilla and roasted almonds, 460 cal

LUNCH: 2pm, momma salad, pickle, two PB&J on whole wheat potato bread, water, 860 cal

DINNER: 7pm, Andouille chicken sausage, steamed string beans, whole wheat Israeli cous-cous, cheesy poofs, 7oz diet sprite, 630 cal

Does this hurricane make me look fat?

August 216.6----> September 214.4----> October 213.4

I started recording my eating on Monday, but once the lights went out, so did my recording, and I'm probably not the only one. Tuesday morning, the news implied that the power would not be going on in the next 24 hours, and maybe as long as 3-5 days, so we split to where there was power. B's momma lives in a well-appointed one bedroom on the Upper East Side, with wonderful, wonderful lights, heat, Internet and cable, a flushing toilet, hot showers, and a working elevator (not to mention a lovely, loving Grandma!).

Still, as nice as it was to be there, it was stressful with NYC seemingly collapsing on itself, sleeping on a sofa, and, lo and behold, hunting for Egg McMuffins for Edie among the horror of several closed McDonald's. On the first day, three different locations were straight-up closed for breakfast, and on the second they were open, but serving lunch in the morning. On Friday, when we finally hit up a Mickey D's with breakfast, we knew the city was getting back on it's feet.

As petty and ridiculous as this might sound, when you have a toddler, you try your best to make everything seem normal and safe and predictable and secure, and a goddamn Egg McMuffin makes it seem that way -- no matter where you go, McDonald's is pretty much identical in taste & experience; and no matter how you feel about McD's nutrition, politics, or environmental practices, for a toddler there is great value in that predictability.  Damn, I can't believe I'm defending McDonald's.

My eating was quite horrible, as Hotel Grandma kitchen doesn't see much scratch cooking, and a big deal was made of clearing out the oven so we could reheat some fancy prepared food Friday night when we had some fellow LES refugees over for Sabbath dinner. Ordered in pizza and Mexican, ate McDonald's or diner food for a few breakfasts. When we arrived uptown, I did a food shop at the local Gourmet Garage for some incredibly overpriced yogurts, bananas, and diet coke, as well as some oddly flavored potato knishes.

Now that we're back on the LES almost a week later, my local major supermarket, which is located next to the East River, remains closed with flood and electrical damage. The smaller, closer market was only half stocked on dairy and meat, about 25% stocked on produce, and totally empty on all frozen goods. Refugee living is not quite behind us.

As the first of the month rolled past while encamped on the UES, I weighed in today. I was expecting to see my weight increase, as this past month I've been slipping more and more. The week of making and selling knishes I went off the reservation a bit, and this past week I've reverted to eating a LOT of sweets. So it was a very unexpected surprise that I lost a pound this past month. My belt is starting to be worn on the 2nd to last loop on occasion, so I guess I shouldn't of been too surprised.

My theory why I'm continuing in the right direction:

1. Even though I ate more in the past month, I'm still eating less than I did unrestricted by 200-500 cal a day.
2. Even though I ate more in the past month, I'm still eating much more veg and protein than carbs and starches when I was unrestricted.
3. My weight routine is seeing results in increased strength. Though I still can't do a damn pull up, I'm getting closer -- I can do a pull up by jumping into position, which doesn't quite count, but it's 100% more fake pull up than when I started trying!

Where I can improve:

1. Stop slippin'. At some point sooner or later, I'll be working a full-time gig and won't have the time or energy to record every bite. Gotta get down to instinct and habit g .
2. Find new fast food. Fast food in NYC is great because it tells you the calorie count, but there has got to be healthier options to McDs.
3. Maybe start cooking more for the whole family, including my wife, whose eating habits have been worrying me more and more since I've gotten my own eating under control.

I usually try to do a jokey fun-quizz on these belly-button gazing entries, but this whole hurricane thing has me off my game.

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MONDAY COUNT:

Storm coming in, just holding down the fort with everyone in doors. Cupcake making was the big activity of the day.

AM SNACK: 9am, iced green tea, 25 cal

BREAKFAST: 10:30am, smoothie, 375 cal

LUNCH: 1:30pm, almond butter and grape jelly on whole wheat toast, momma salad, 2 pickles, 12oz diet coke., 960 cal

Pull-ups put me in touch with my feminine side.

OMG: back boobz!

Damn pull-ups. Turns out I'm more like a chick than a dude. It's accepted "common wisdom" that women can not do pull-ups as well as men, due to gender-specific physical builds. Some scientists wanted to see if it was cultural, so they took a bunch of non-pull-upping ladies and trained them over a period of months, weight-training, dieting, assisted pull-ups, etc. They were surprised to find that after a 36% average strength increase and an average 2% reduction in body fat, only 4 of the 17 women in the study could do one measly pull-up.

But Vanderburgh said the study and other research has shown that performing a pull-up requires more than simple upper-body strength. Men and women who can do them tend to have a combination of strength, low body fat, and shorter stature. 

Simply put, yes, you can increase strength and lose weight, and that might help you do a pull-up; but, if you're large already (whether by fat or height and long-limbs), it'll decrease your chances of doing a damn pull-up. The ladies over at Jezebel have gotten their panties in a bunch, decrying the "lie" of the Presidential Physical Fitness Test because women can't do pull ups. Uh, but of course they can, but their physiological builds make it harder/less likely than men. I'm not sure why they're getting all angry over there. Women. Wimmin. Wymn.

I still haven't done a proper pull-up yet, but my assisted pull-ups are coming along nicely, and I recently discovered I can skip the stool and actually jump into the assisted position, so there is that. I think I may start an extra weight lift that just focuses on that damn muscle that connects the back of my arm to my back...

Pull ups that I can say, in all honesty, that I've mastered.

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WEEKLY AVERAGE: 2,528

Ugg. Another not great week of eating. Feel good physically, starting to use 2nd hole of the belt, but I can't help but think my weight-loss has come to a halt. I guess I'll know sooner than later.

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MONDAY COUNT: 2690
Woke up tired from the weekend, good time selling knishes at two different events, but was so wired actually drank a glass of whiskey on the rocks last night to wind down at midnight when I realized I couldn't fall asleep despite being over-tired. Served it with 3 ice cubes in a glass tumbler from my grandmother, used to have a set of them in college, this is the last one to survive, probably 1950's era. I'm not a drinker, and the first few sips were to alchy and gross, but as it watered down with the ice, the flavor of the wood really came through, and it became the drink equivalent of an old, wood-paneled library somewhere in New England, on a brisk fall evening, with a fire-place. This is probably the first time I ever actually enjoyed whiskey.

Got a good weight-lift in in the morning. After skipping it once last week, I upped the reps from 7 to 8, the assisted pull-ups from 3 to 4, the push ups and sit ups from 35 to 40. (When the reps are 10 for a while, I increase the amount of weight and go back to 5 reps) Fell asleep before 10pm.

BREAKFAST: 10am, smoothie, 350 cal
A lot of near-rotten bananas got frozen and thrown into today's smoothie, very mild but nice taste.

LUNCH: 12:30pm, almond butter and grape jelly on whole wheat toast, hummus on whole wheat toast, sauerkraut, water, 680 cal

PM SNACK: 5:30pm, cheese crackers, 150 cal

DINNER: 6:45pm, cheese tortellini in butter with teriyaki chicken meatballs, 860 cal

EVENING SNACK; 8:30pm, popcorn, +/-650 cal
Hurrrg. I think I was a victim of a misprint. The packaging of the popcorn kernels said "Serving Size 1/4 cup (132g)", but when I measured out 132g on the scale, it was about 3/4 cup. A quarter cup was only about 40g. But I made it with butter and oil, thinking the calories would be about 340. The next morning, while writing this up, I checked online and indeed, it' a misprint. Fuckers.

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TUESDAY COUNT: 2525
I don't think I knew how tired I was yesterday. Woke up pleasantly sore in the chest from the weights, and my thighs are still sore from standing all day on Sunday....in a good way. Bike riding rarely makes my thighs sore anymore, so it's good it got a different form of exercise to get stronger.

BREAKFAST: 9am, steel cut oatmeal, 375 cal

LUNCH: 12:45pm, sardine and avocado on whole wheat toast, momma salad, sauerkraut, 2 macaroons, 900 cal

DINNER: 5:30pm, lentils and brown rice with yogurt and caramelized onions, a few sips of wine, water, about a cup of ice cream, +/-650 cal

EVENING SNACK: 9:30pm, 8 pork and chive steamed dumplings, +/- 300 cal

EVENING SNACK: 11pm, chocolate chips and peanuts, +/- 300 cal

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WEDNESDAY COUNT: 2325
School went really well, and kept myself to small portions of the high-cal steak and mac n' cheese, and had a double serving of the brussel sprouts. Got a semi-healthy slice of pizza on the way home, and cut up the brownies I made for ice cream sandwiches this weekend, and ate some off-ends. Went to bed feeling almost hungry, so feel comfortable with the estimated numbers.

AM SNACK: 7:45am, iced green tea, 25 cal

BREAKFAST: 9:30am, organic whole grain cheerio with milk, 300 cal

LUNCH: 12:45pm, quarter pounder, fries, diet coke, 900 cal

PM SNACK: 2pm, momma salad, 100 cal

SCHOOL DINNER: 6:30pm, chimichurri flank steak, mac n' cheese, roasted brussel sprouts, water, +/-500 cal

EVENING SNACK: 8pm, slice of whole wheat pizza, a few brownie scraps, +/- 500 cal

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THURSDAY COUNT: 2375
Successfully cooked for the PTA with my students, fed about 70 people chicken parm heroes, lemon broccoli and chocolate chip cookies. Chicken was really good, we made the breadcrumbs fresh, as well as the sauce, and the combo quick frying and then baking with the cheese made for hot, fresh sandwiches, much better than the pre-cooked day-old stuff you typically get.

AM SNACK: 7:45am, iced green tea, 25 cal

BREAKFAST: 9:45am, steel cut oatmeal, 200 cal
Wifey went and ate about half of my oatmeal. It takes upward of an hour to make, so I just ate the leftovers.

LUNCH: 12:30pm, two andouille chicken sausages, steamed string beans, whole wheat cous cous, a pickle, 7oz diet coke, 750 cal
Still feels weird how much more healthy food you get for the same calories as denser, less healthy foods. This was a relatively big plate of food for the calories.

SCHOOL DINNER: 6pm, chicken parm sandwich, chocolate chip cookies, diet coke, +/- 800 cal

EVENING SNACK: 9pm, homemade ice cream & brownies, +/- 600 cal

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FRIDAY COUNT: 2725
Ugg, went nuts on some ice cream, got hungry before going out to a friend's house for a reasonable home cooked meal. Bleah.

AM SNACK: 7:45am, iced green tea, 15 cal

BREAKFAST: 9:15am, organic whole grain cheerios with whole milk, 300 cal

AM SNACK: 11am, pastrami, +/- 100 cal

LUNCH: 12:30pm, Stouffer's French Bread Pizzas, momma salad, 7oz diet coke, 960 cal

PM SNACK: 5pm, ice cream and chocolate syrup binge, +/- 600 cal

DINNER: 7:45pm, chicken, brussels, challah, farro, ice cream sandwich, glass of beer, +/-750

Why bother being healthy when you can medicate?

Quick! Get this man 20 years of healthy diet and regular exercise, stat!

Another study, another big hunk of noise to make people confused, upset and discouraged.  It seems controlling diet and weight loss is no more effective than the current drugs available to treat heart attacks and strokes in people with Type 2 diabetes. What gets lost, however, is this quote from the ass-end of the article:

“You can take more medications — and more, I should say, expensive medications — or you can chose a lifestyle intervention and use fewer drugs and come to the same cardiovascular disease risk.”

Jesus. No, diet and exercise is not a magic bullet to cure sick people of all that ails them, but it's a lot cheaper and has a lot nicer side effects than sucking on Big Pharma's teat, and JUST AS EFFECTIVE. Uggg, that's a BIG F'N DEAL. Instead, this study is being dismissed as a failure and a footnote. Blurg. And that is what I'll say about that.

Except for one little thing that bothered me for different reasons....

The diet involved 1,200 to 1,500 calories a day for those weighing less than 250 pounds and 1,500 to 1,800 calories a day for those weighing more. 

1,200 to 1.500 cal a day? Holy shitzu! My nutritionist recommended 2,200-2,350 a day, and I'm well below 250 lbs. I also don't have diabetes, but still. Now that I know what 2.200 cal really means, I don't know how I would be happy on 1.200 cal, unless I got all spiritual, yogic and slightly nutso (minus the calorie-laden nuts, of course.) But the voice in my head is saying, "Duders, if you want to see the significant weight-loss you desire and kick Tom Cruise's ass, you need to come to terms." Blurgy blurg.

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This was an unusual week, not a lot of thought to diet, as you can see below. I was blogging daily over on my start-up's website. And kickstarter!
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WEEKLY AVERAGE:???
This was not a typical week. I spent the weekend being mellow and avoiding getting the sickness that has been passed back in forth in the family for a few weeks, and the week was dedicated to producing knishes to sell at two events on the weekend. I just didn't have the time or energy to count calories, but rereading this log, I see I never lost control and gorged. I was probably over calorie budget, but not eat-a-box-of-donuts over. Still, I wonder if I'll lose weight this month, hurrrrr....

MONDAY COUNT:2350
Don't feel well. Slept 12 hours Saturday night and skipped a bike ride I was looking forward to on Sunday to try to keep an even keel. Taking 500mg of vitamin C every morning for the past 3 or 4 days. Did my weight routine yesterday as I had the luxury of time. Got 8 hours in last night. I really need to be straight this week to get through to a successful table at the Hester Street Fair, gonna play it as conservative as possible. And that's coming from a life-long Democrat!

AM SNACK: 8:30am, iced green tea, 25 cal
Last tea for the week, need the space in the fridge for knish production.

BREAKFAST: 11:45am, organic chex with whole milk, 300 cal
Also drinking water all morning as I have been doing the past few days. Drank about a pint up to this point, and about 2 quarts during the day yesterday.

LUNCH: 2pm, 6" veggie burger subway hero with potato chips and 20oz diet coke, 760 cal

PM SNACK: 5:15pm, baby carrots & a pickle, 90 cal

DINNER: 6:15pm, teriyaki chicken meatballs with whole wheat cous cous and sauteed spinach, 975 cal

EVENING SNACK: 7pm, 4 homemade cookies, +/- 200 cal

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TUESDAY COUNT: 2330

Put myself to bed last night at 10, didn't really fall asleep until around midnight. Woke up at 7:30 dazed, but not coughing. Muddled through basic knish prep, cooking kasha, cutting pastrami, roasting pumpkin, etc. Did a shift at the CSA in the evening, did a cleansing meal at McD's after. Had the "chicken select" thingies, not bad, but not really "good". Crust oddly peppery and the flesh wasn't moist, it was "moist", like injected with saline solution until the cells of the meat almost burst. Bleah. 

BREAKFAST: 8:45am, full fat fage with honey, almonds and vanilla, 440 cal

LUNCH: 1:15pm, eggplant hero with no moz, garden salad with dressing on side, +/-800 cal

PM SNACK: 4pm, 7oz diet coke, 0 cal

PM SNACK: 5:30pm, baby carrots, 80 cal

DINNER: 8:30pm, weird chicken things, fries, diet coke, 1010 cal

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WEDNESDAY COUNT: ???

Attempted to lift weights this morning, but gave up during stretches, just too tired.

BREAKFAST: 9:30am, whole grain organic cheerios with whole milk, 300 cal

LUNCH: 2pm, 2 slices of streetza, 20 oz diet coke, ??cal

SCHOOL SNACK: 6:45pm, tiny piece of sauteed chicken, small amount of shrimp, small amount of Cesar salad, glass of apple juice, ??cal

EVENING SNACK: 9pm, almonds and chocolate chips, ?? cal

DINNER: 10pm, fresh whole wheat pasta with butter, parm, ?? cal

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THURSDAY COUNT: ???

Woke up and knished. Tasted here and there, but did not eat the product. Ordered in lunch, ate dinner out when I went to restock for tomorrow's cooking.

LUNCH: 12:30pm, shrimp and string beans over brown rice, shrimp toast, 12oz diet coke, ??cal

DINNER: 8:15pm, 2 slices of pizza, small cup of ice cream, ?? cal
I bought a small single-serving cup of ice cream out of a freezer case, I guessed it had 150, maybe 200 cal. According to the packaging, the tiny 3.5oz portion had 310 cal. Wowzers. I could have easily eaten a portion 3x the size and still thought it was "reasonable".

EVENING SNACK: 10pm, half a pint of vegetable lomein, ?? cal

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FRIDAY COUNT: ???

Woke up after 9 hours feeling good, everything is on schedule

BREAKFAST: 8:30am, organic whole grain cheerios with whole milk, handful of choclate covered espresso beans, ?? cal

LUNCH: 12:30pm, sushi, shumai, smal green salad, 7oz diet coke, ??cal

DINNER: ????
I didn't write it down, it's Monday now and it's all a blur. I know it wasn't something stupid or excessive.

My dad and his sausage.

From Esquire Magazine, Dec 1999. For their 100th year publishing, they did a head shot and blurb from one person born in each of those years. Some famous, some grabbed off the street like my poppa.

My dad liked to play "hide the sausage". He was born in Vienna, Austria, to solidly upper-middle-class Jews in 1934. Though the dad I knew was pretty much a Jew by culture and a solid atheist by belief, back then there really was no such thing as an "atheist Jew". Everyone went to temple, everyone honored the high holidays, everyone ate kosher by default. This was before the reform movement in Judiaism. You were either "religious" or "very religious". There was no wiener schnitzel in the Wildmann household circa 1934 Vienna, and there was no pork sausage in the Wildman* household circa 1971, Staten Island....except for the hidden breakfast sausages that were tucked in the back of the freezer, never to be openly served in the kitchen. So what did you think I meant by "hide the sausage"? 

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Sausage

Though my dad arrived in the U.S. in 1940, he and his family left Vienna in early 1939. They first spent time as refugees in Cuba, and after about 6-8 months, the U.S. started accepting refugees from the Holocaust. His father tried to start up his music-store business in the U.S., but was unable to get traction but found work. His mother had a number tattoo on her arm she never spoke of or explained. As a 6 year old in the Bronx, he spoke German and some Spanish, but not  a lick of English. The one or two photographs that exist from this time show a skinny kid with a massively round head, like a Peanuts character who had seen too much of the world. 

Ist dieser Ellis Island? Espero que no haya buena salchicha.

What was he eating? What did they serve in Cuba? Did his parents keep up with the kosher diet after having their entire lives uprooted, traumatized and tossed to the other side of the world? My father passed after a long, successful and well-loved life a few years ago, and I'm afraid those answers are gone. But I remember growing up with the impact of his early years.

I grew up in a big house with front and back yards on a hill in Staten Island. The 1920's era construction had a full basement with a washer/dryer, a boarded-up abandoned mud-room and a secondary room used as a fully functioning wood-shop. My dad made much of the cabinetry for the house, some of which lives on in my brother's home and my apartment. And then there was the food pantry.

Underneath the stairs leading from the ground floor to the basement was a large wooden unit with doors which my father made. It was stained a medium brown, and the doors were cheap thin plywood with a little metal clasp to keep them from swinging open. The multiple shelves with in were always full of mostly canned goods, some glass jars and boxes of dry goods. I remember huge cans of College Inn Chicken Broth, gefilte fish, ketchup, tomatoes and tomato sauce, dried beans, rice.

From the earliest memories until the day they moved from that house to retire, that food pantry was always full. Whenever there was a sale at the supermarket, 10 of something would go in the pantry. If there was a steep discount for dented cans, those dented cans would end up in the pantry. I think about 65% of the canned goods in that pantry ended up rusting, swelling and being thrown out. It would drive my mom crazy, but my dad would just grunt and shrug it off.

In hindsight and with some education, I now realize that my dad was acting in a way that probably meant he had some serious deprivation when he was a kid. Food probably wasn't too forthcoming when they packed their bags, traded in all their wealth for paperwork to get the hell out of Vienna, take a steamer to Cuba, then spend months and months in a refugee camp. He never spoke of it, but it oozed out into the pantry in the basement.

And then there was the hidden sausage. What the hell was that about? My parents did not keep a kosher household, but what we ate was primarily influenced by what they grew up with, which was kosher and kosher-style. The pantry was out in the open, but the sausages were in the back of the freezer, never to be served out in the open. I only knew it was my dad's because my mom would bitch about my dad hording food and batteries in the freezer (they were on sale!). My mom would have loved to throw out as much as possible if my dad let her. There were plenty of large trays of meat that would eventually get freezer-burned and thrown out, but there was always a small number of Jimmy Deans in the back.

And I ate them. I would reheat them in the newfangled microwave, and eat their greasy, goyish spicy goodness on the down-low. It gave me the same thrill as going into the basement and rifling through my dad's massive collection of Playboy magazines. It was naughty, it was adult, mom didn't approve, it was so NOT Jewish! Mmmm sausage!

My dad grew up with too little, I grew up with too much. I hope I can get it right with my kids. My dad could blame Hitler, so perhaps I can blame Hitler  for my over-eating, too. I'm sure that would make Big Soda and the Food Industry happy. -sigh-

Good thing or bad thing: when one google-images "funny Hitler", nothing particularly funny comes up?

*When my dad and his family passed through Ellis Island in 1940, they lost the extra N. By naming me Noah, they brought enough Ns back for everyone!

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Mmmm, go-go juice!

ADD and ADHD is a topic way too large for a glib addendum, but there was a frightening piece in the NY Times this week about giving ADD meds to kids in school to help them increase their grades. NOT because they have ADD, but because the schools are low on funds and have given up on trying to increase their grades the ol' fashioned way. As I read the headline, my first thought is, "did they consider diet?" But as the news-churn has been demonstrating, adjusting school diets is a fraught and expensive thing, while drugs are cheap. More next week.

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Nice to see a well-done anti-soda promotion. Nice to see the polar bears and "HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY" themes of the multi-billion dollar Coke advertising complex recontextualized.
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WEEKLY AVERAGE: 2,463
REFINED SUGAR: 15%
Not a great eating week, almost every day I succumbed to some form of refined sugar, and illness made the later part of the week sloppy. Next week I'm focused on cooking for a knish event on Saturday, the kitchen will be turned over to production, a little worried my eating is going to take a turn for the worse.
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MONDAY COUNT: 2535
Due to school being closed for more Jewish holidays, Edie rode on my back while I did my second set of push ups. Managed to get through 15 instead of the usual 35, but considering 10 used to be my limit for unweighted push ups, that's pretty good. Haven't slept well in a couple of days, woke up tired.

AM SNACK: 7:30am, iced green tea, 25 cal

BREAKFAST: 9am, steel cut oatmeal with butter, sugar, vanilla, cinnamon & salt, water, 375 cal

AM SNACK: 10:30am, momma salad, 100 cal

LUNCH: 12:30pm, fresh papadelle pasta with chicken & andouille ragu, small side salad, 12oz diet coke, +/-850 cal

DINNER: 6:30pm, broiled sole, steamed string beans, whole wheat cous cous, 7oz diet sprite, 935 cal

EVENING SNACK: 7pm, cake from a box, +/-250 cal
Wasn't planning on dessert, but a friend came over with cake, and it was exactly what I needed after a high-stress, under-slept day. Hormones or something.
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TUESDAY COUNT: 2175
Tried to do some work after everyone went to bed, then tried to watch TV, and failed at both. Put myself in bed at 10, woke up to B leaving for work at 8:30, guess I needed that. Wasn't hungry for breakfast, but Edie insisted on noisy ice cream, so I guess it was good in that it kept me to an eating schedule -- people who eat more breakfast eat less dinner.

Ordered in Chinese with grandma, but since this is not a weekend, tried to go light -- string beans instead of noodles, 1 cup plain brown rice instead of 2 cups of fried rice. Still calorie-heavy, but not obscene, and by the end of day, I felt that slight hunger, but nothing I couldn't sleep on.

AM SNACK: 9am, iced green tea, 25 cal

BREAKFAST: 9:30am,  fruit smoothie, 375 cal

AM SNACK: 11:45am, momma salad, 100 cal

LUNCH: 1pm, sardine & avocado on whole wheat toast, 7oz diet sprite, 525 cal

DINNER: 6pm. shrimp & stringbeans with 1 cup brown rice, shrimp toast, 12oz diet coke, +/- 900 cal

EVENING SNACK: 9:15pm, 8oz chocolate milk. 250 cal

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WEDNESDAY COUNT: 2425

Chores in the morning, got home for lunch, fit in weights in in the afternoon . Controlled my eating at school, and had a relatively light dinner. 

AM SNACK: 8:30am, iced green tea, 25 cal

BREAKFAST: 9:30am, steel cut oatmeal, 300 cal

LUNCH: 1pm, almond butter & grape jelly on whole wheat sandwiches, momma salad, 7oz diet coke, 960 cal

SCHOOL SNACK: 6:30pm, small piece of grilled chicken, 1 ladle of mashed potatoes, small portion of swiss chard with caramelized onions, lemonade, +/-400 cal

DINNER: 8:30pm, Stouffer's Frenchbread pizza, 740 cal ds axd

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THURSDAY COUNT: 2365

Are there restaurants in the city that are healthier than national-chain fast food that ALSO supplies calorie counts? I want to go to there.

AM SNACK: 7:45am, iced green tea, 25 cal

BREAKFAST: 9:00am, whole grain chex with whole milk, 300 cal

AM SNACK: 11:30am, momma salad, 100 cal

LUNCH: 12:15pm, quarter pounder, fries, diet coke, 900 cal

PM SNACK: 3:30pm, 7oz diet sprite, 0 cal

DINNER: 6:30pm, whole wheat spaghetti with chicken sausage, tomato sauce and roasted brussel sprouts, water 1040 cal

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FRIDAY COUNT: 2815

Original plan was to wake up early and go riding, but couldn't get out of bed, sore throat, foggy head. Fortunately I had the ability to chill, with a baby sitter taking care of the Milli. Spent a slow day indoors, took myself out for lunch, then again in the late evening for dinner. Not a good eating day, but food did give me comfort.

BREAKFAST: 10am, good yogurt with honey, vanilla, almonds, +/- 500 cal

PM SNACK: 1:30pm, momma salad, pickle, 115 cal

LUNCH: 3pm, veg dim sum, +/- 1000 cal

DINNER: 9:45pm, 2 slices of streetza, ice cream bar, +/-900 cal

EVENING SNACK: 11pm, peanuts & chocolate chips, +/- 300 cal

Fruity Problems

Why do you think I'd even CONSIDER eating the fruit, you silly photographer?!

A few weeks ago a bunch of retired, grandfatherly generals & admirals issued a report warning that kids today are too fat, too stupid, too stoned and too poor to adequately staff the military of the future, not to mention to drive the growth of our economy or prevent a total collapse of our health care system. Most of their suggested solutions involved drafting Congress to legislate school policy, mainly healthier meals and more physical education.

A few weeks later, reports are zinging around the Internet tubes that because of the recent upgrade of healthiness in national school nutrition standards, kids are rebelling in full force.

Because the lunches must now include fruits and vegetables, those who clamor for more cheese-laden nachos may find string beans and a peach cup instead. Because of limits on fat and sodium, some of those who crave French fries get baked sweet-potato wedges. Because of calorie restrictions, meat and carbohydrate portions are smaller. Gone is 2-percent chocolate milk, replaced by skim.

“Before, there was no taste and no flavor,” said Malik Barrows, a senior at Automotive High School in Brooklyn, who likes fruit but said his classmates threw away their mandatory helpings on the cafeteria floor. “Now there’s no taste, no flavor and it’s healthy, which makes it taste even worse.”

The preferred fruit of today's students.

The results of the new standards are in: Lots of fruit and veg are appearing in cafeteria garbage cans and kids are complaining that they are not being fed enough. Almost makes me wish those retired generals would come on down to the schools and give those kids a good ol' fashioned talkin'-to.

So what is there to do? Perhaps nothing.

But the most effective strategy, several food service directors said, may simply be waiting. Research shows that children must be exposed to vegetables 10 to 12 times before they will eat them on their own, said William J. McCarthy, a professor of public health and psychology at the University of California, Los Angeles.

I am all for the government using policy to protect the interests and health of the people. But for policy to be effective it must decide which is more important: the health of the nation's physical well-being or the health of the nation's entrenched economic interests. The fine folks behind the Too Fat to Fight reports don't go far enough. Legislating healthier lunches and more gym classes is fine but is what it's not what's happening during school lunching hours that's making them obese; it's everywhere else.

We need to balance the needs of a food industry that demands growth & profit at all costs in the same way we need to look at a health care industry that also demands profits over anything else. Rational food supply and sane health care are universal rights, not privileges to those who can afford it. Capitalism should not run unfettered and all-consuming but needs to be fair and balanced (if you'll pardon the Fox). Perhaps banning advertising of unhealthy foods the way we did with cigarette advertising is a step in the right direction.  Or creating national portion standards like NYC's soda ban. Or legislate price supports for fruit and veg and new taxes on junk food. Rather than reporting on a bunch of whiny lil' kids complaining about the burden of having to throw away fruit every day, let's start agitating for policy that makes fruit a more familiar, affordable, and common part of the young American diet.

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A major problem of rapid weight loss is pubic hair turning into measuring tape that spreads out across one's torso.

Until Googleplex ate last week's post, I wrote about my impressions of a series of photos featured on Jezebel.

We are flooded with media messages and images about losing weight: PSA campaigns, sneaker ads, reality shows, before and after commercials, in which celebs beam with joy in photos proving that they've slimmed down. They're often perfectly toned, in a bikini, grinning ear to ear.

In reality, if you drop a ton of weight quickly, you're going to be trapped in a skin-suit a few sized too big for you, particularly if you are older. Julia Kozerski's is that person, and her photographs brought up a lot of feelings, in regards to attempting to change my body after so many years of being on the plumper side. Have I ruined my body after years of abuse? If my flesh does that, will I be comfortable or will I desire to be fat again? Will my flesh do that? Do I care, does my vanity trump my will to be healthy? Or do they reinforce each other?

Have no fear dear reader, no matter which way my flesh goes, I will be writing about it, not taking nudie photos of it....

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Amurika, F-yeah!

On Thursday, burnt out from cooking all day, I went to the local supermarket to pick up something...and happened upon something I hadn't seen before: Jack Daniel's Pulled Chicken. I saw that it was fully cooked, it was chicken and it was saucy.

I am not a big BBQ person but a few years ago I rode my bicycle cross-country and found that BBQ in Kansas was one of the most delicious foods on the planet. With that sense memory in the back of my head, I bought a packet of the chicken. What the hey, perhaps a shot of booze in the sauce will give it a nice heat.

When I heated it, portioned it and put it on the plate, it looked a little watery but so what. When I put it in my mouth, all I tasted was....syrup. This is chicken in sugar syrup. No smoke, no heat, no spices, no meatiness, just sweet. My first thought was, "Did I just put a dessert in my mouth by accident?" My second thought was:

Sugar-sweet slammin' shredded bird, duderino!

I tried to eat my portion, but I could not, it was just too sweet. What I failed to do was read the ingredients closely enough. 

What I originally saw was a lot of words for chicken at the front. What I failed to see was that the chicken was "tumbled with sugar," and the sauce's 1st, 2nd, 8th, and 9th ingredients were all forms of sugar. Actual Jack Daniels? 15th, less than salt. My taste buds were not lying -- the "sauce" literally was sugar syrup with a few other things thrown in.

Maybe it's because I've been naturally decreasing my sugar consumption over the last few months that my taste buds went wild (in a bad way) when eating this stuff. One thing for certain, my stomach felt queasy for the rest of the night and only snacking on some starches and even some mildly sweet dark chocolate chips brought me back to feeling myself. People eat this stuff out of habit? And liking it? Jebsus. 

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WEEKLY AVERAGE: 2275 cal
ESTIMATED REFINED SUGAR %: 12.5%

Good weekly average due to refocusing after finding I only lost 2 lbs last month. Refined sugar higher than I'd like because of Thursday's mistake with that horrible pulled chicken.

MONDAY COUNT: 2165
Put myself to bed hungry, but it wasn't so bad as I was leveraging the excess calories from the weekend. Lifted weights, lower back still a little sore but definitely better than last Thursday. The lift for the back routine was for mid-back, so it went fine. Started holding my negative pull-ups to the count of 5 instead of three, definitely feel it. Will October be the month of the first real pull-up?

Today and tomorrow, Edie has no school due to the Jewish holidays. Almost broke down and made frozen pizza for lunch, but figured that would be a bad way to kick off the new month.

AM SNACK: 7:30am, iced green tea, 25 cal

BREAKFAST: 9:30am, fruit smoothie, 375 cal

LUNCH: 1pm, sardine & avocado on whole wheat bread, health salad, baby carrots, 7oz diet coke, 715 cal

PM SNACK: 3pm, banana, 135 cal

DINNER: 7pm, sauteed shrimp, roasted brussel sprouts, baked potatoes with butter, 7oz diet sprite, 915 cal
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TUESDAY COUNT:2365

Edie off from school again, feeling a bit stressed. Finding stress is a good way to not think about food -- just eat enough, then move on. Got really hungry in the evening, the kinda hunger I know will keep me up, fortunately I had enough leeway in the budget to make a big bowl of popcorn -- it' a great snack because there is a lot of jawing and grabbing involved, takes a while to eat.

AM SNACK: 8:00am, iced green tea, 25 cal

BREAKFAST: 9:30am, kolon bloe with whole milk, 300 cal

LUNCH: 12:15pm, 2 peanut butter & jelly sandwiches on whole wheat, momma salad, 750 cal

PM SNACK: 4pm, small handful of animal crackers, +/- 50 cal

DINNER: 6:15pm, broiled sole, lemon ricotta pancakes, sauteed spinach, 7oz diet sprite, 1000 cal

EVENING SNACK: 9:45pm, popcorn, 240 cal

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WEDNESDAY COUNT: 2355

Taught culinary for the first time since last Spring. First class is always fun, lecturing on food and kitchen safety, making some basic stuff using lots of knife work. Last time I taught was during my 'old' way of eating. Smoothies were pretty reasonable, based on the non-refined sugar, fruit-based recipe from home. I forgot to add oil to the salsa, still came out good and the kids loved it, so I took some home with an estimated calorie value. I had my graduates make 4 sheets of brownies, 3 for the school to sell at a flea market, and one to eat. I served it hot out of the oven, and it looked AMAZEBALLS, but I avoided it, as well as the full-sugar soda supplied to the kids. Before, I would of ate 2 brownies (+/- 500 cal) and at least 12 oz of soda (120) and come home and eaten a big dinner anyway. 

AM SNACK: 8:30am, iced green tea, 25 cal

BREAKFAST: 9:15am, kolon bloe with whole milk, 300 cal

LUNCH: 12:45pm, whole wheat pasta in red sauce with chicken sausage, string beans, 2 pickles, 14oz diet coke, 860 cal

SCHOOL SNACK: 5-7pm, tastes of various student smoothies, small plate of fresh salsa, guac & chips, +/- 150 cal

DINNER: 8:30pm, Stouffers French bread pizzas, momma salad, 7oz diet coke, 1020 cal

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THURSDAY COUNT: 2715

Lifted weights in the morning, went well -- did some lower back exercises successfully without pain, still achy but 90% better. Baked knishes in the afternoon for sale, did taste the mix a few times for salt but I'm not going to get THAT anal about putting in maybe a +/- 50 cal taste. Though I did eat the momma salad right before cooking just to make sure I didn't mindlessly put more in my mouth than that...

AM SNACK: 7:30am, iced green tea, 25 cal

BREAKFAST: 9:45am, Fage full fat Greek yogurt with honey, vanilla and almonds, 340 cal

LUNCH: 12:15pm, quarter pounder, fries, 20oz diet coke, 900 cal

PM SNACK: 2:30pm, momma salad, 100 cal

DINNER: 7:30pm, pulled bbq chicken, school made salsa and Tostidos corn chips, pickle, 850 cal
Felt like something different and easy, picked up some corn chips and packaged container of BBQ chicken. I should have stayed away from it, as the first ingredient in the sauce was brown sugar, and the second ingredient was....sugar. Blech, like chicken drowning in syrup, could not finish it. I guess that is the taste of America.

EVENING SNACKS: 9-10pm, chocolate chips & peanuts, potato chips, tortilla chips, +/- 500
That sweet chicken stuff left me feeling weird, sugared up and it drove my appetite wonky. Took comfort in the fact I had a bike ride scheduled tomorrow to hopefully even out the budget for the week.

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BIKE CREDIT: 1760

FRIDAY COUNT: 1785

Left out early and spent half the day on the bike, riding to Staten Island. Good energizing ride after so many rainy days. Tried to be conservative with the eating, I think it might have helped me, never had any up/down swings in energy over the 75 miles.

AM SNACK: 6:30am, iced green tea, 25 cal

AM SNACK: 7am, 2 donuts from Donut Plant, +/-400 cal

BIKE BREAKFAST: 10am, whole wheat bagel with cream cheese, 20oz Gatorade, +/- 500 cal

BIKE SNACK: 12:45pm, 20oz diet Dr Pepper, 0 cal

BIKE LUNCH: 2:15pm, 3 Jamaican meat patties, 1220 cal

DINNER: 7:15pm, Pad Prik King with tofu and sticky rice, fried shrimp roll, Thai salad, +/-1400 cal

Slight Progress is Still Progress

July 222----> August 216.6----> September 214.4

For the second full month of sticking to a calorie budget of 2200-2350 during the week, I lost about two pounds, a significant decrease over the previous month of 5.5 lbs  The  Tanita scale tells me I'm 37.2% body fat, which is slightly more than last month, so I'll discount that as just a mech-blip. So what am I to conclude from this dramatic decrease in weight-loss?

1. My body is adjusting to the new diet, and instinctively trying to protect itself from "famine".
2. Last month's loss was exaggerated by moving to a new scale
3. I might have ate more on the weekends than the previous month, and found Fridays a bit of a slippery slope this month.

Regardless of this smaller number, fact is for the past two years I've gained about 2-3 lbs in September. I'm finding clothes that haven't fit me in many years now fit me. I'm starting to get used to saying 'thanks' to the friends that are noticing my weight loss more and more. I still haven't gotten a full pull up in, but I'm getting incrementally closer. So for the next month:

1. Do a damn pull-up.
2. As fall and winter cuts my biking down, control my weekend eating better.
3. Cut down on the fast food to once during the week and once on the weekends.

I did have a long post prepared, with a few media commentaries, multiple choice quizz, and a daily reporting of the last week, but for some reason Google ate it. I've "sent feedback" to the Googleplex and haven't yet heard a peep. If it ever comes back, I'll slot it in... Uggg.