The End of Fat Before It Was Cool

216.4-->212.4-->209.8

After 2 years of slow weight gain after 2 years of slightly quicker weight loss, I seem to be back on the loss cycle. During a family Passover seder, a lovely (and loving) aunt who I see only about once or twice a year pulled me aside and asked me, "What happened to your diet? You seemed to be doing so well." I imagine if I was female or younger or less secure in my self, this would be a dagger in my heart, but I took it as sincere concern from an older generation who have different assumptions about weight loss and fat people. The conflict between our world views is pretty damn well summarized in this recent NY Times article.

“The key point is that you can be on TV, you can lose enormous amounts of weight, you can go on for six years, but you can’t get away from a basic biological reality,” said Dr. Schwartz, who was not involved in the study. “As long as you are below your initial weight, your body is going to try to get you back.”
The show’s doctor, Robert Huizenga, says he expected the contestants’ metabolic rates to fall just after the show, but was hoping for a smaller drop. He questioned, though, whether the measurements six years later were accurate. But maintaining weight loss is difficult, he said, which is why he tells contestants that they should exercise at least nine hours a week and monitor their diets to keep the weight off.
“Unfortunately, many contestants are unable to find or afford adequate ongoing support with exercise doctors, psychologists, sleep specialists, and trainers — and that’s something we all need to work hard to change,” he said in an email.

When I got to the bottom of the weight curve at the end of 2013, I started getting ravenous, and I thought of a truism taught to me by my parents and my aunt's generation: when you are hungry, eat. On the face of it, this is "common sense" but beware of any one or any politician trying to sell you something on the basis of "common sense" -- they are appealing to your baser ignorance instead of your higher urge to learn more about what is really happening.

I was hungrier than usual, so I said eh, my body is telling me to eat, and we first and foremost must listen to our bodies. Eating disorders are seen as emotional and psychological problems that interfere with our abilities to feed ourselves in response to bodily signals. Well, my bodily signals have been literally, scientifically-proven and unilaterally hijacking my hormones to alter my behavior to regain as much weight as possible. It's not for a lack of willpower, or mindfulness, or moral upstanding, it's what we're genetically programmed to do based on cave-man times.

To put it succinctly, it's not my fault, but it is my responsibility. The usefulness of this blog has come to an end. Look at the list of topics to the right, I think I've said all I need on each one - the purpose was to educate and entertain myself with the act of writing, and it served that purpose well. It also served to keep myself accountable for my eating by posting my food diaries in public, and my need for that has lessened -- I have my shit together, I don't need the fear of having to say "I ate 2 boxes of twinkles last night before crying myself to sleep" in public to keep me eating healthy.  I still have more to learn and clarify, but I think I'm going to do that in a less straight forward, more personal and emotional form in a writing project TBD. Maybe another blog, maybe not. Any suggestions?
----

This is not my first rodeo. Though this blog started at the beginning of '12 and ran through the first third of '16, there was:

• Snicklesnack (2012)
• Learning to Feed (2007-2012)
• Culinary School Confidential (2008-2010)
• Knishery NYC (2011-2013)

and the only non-food blog and perhaps most popular, the blog of my cross country bikeride:

• Betsy, I'll Be Home for Thanksgiving (2007)

The most popular post from this blog: from 2012, with 611 views and twice the amount of the next-best viewed, an opening salvo on the Demon Sugar.

Before deciding to end this blog, my next entry was going to riff on this article, but after reading through all the material it linked to, my emotional response was: I can't. I just can't. So many lies and half-truths, so much "common sense" that is nonsense in practice. May the burning of this blog light my way.

Thanks for reading out there. Despite your silence, the page views speaks of a common human empathy that makes it worthwhile. Love on ya.

-----

WEEK 1/4

MONDAY COUNT: 2650
SLEPT: 9pm - 6am, 9 hrs

AM SNACK: 6:15am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1 : 10am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 12:30pm, steel cut oatmeal, 450 cal

PM SNACK: 2:45pm, beef patty, tomato soup, momma salad, 540 cal

DINNER: 6:15pm, lemon sole, roasted asparagus, poppa salad, 650 cal

EVENING SNACK: 7:30pm, popcorn, kind bar, peanut butter crackers, +/- 850 cal

-----

TUESDAY COUNT: 2160

SLEPT: 9:30pm-6am,  8.5 hrs

AM SNACK: 6:15am,  iced green tea

BREAKFAST: 10:15am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 11:45am, Fage with honey, vanilla almonds,  450 cal

PM SNACK: 3pm, momma salad, veggie straws, 230 cal

LUNCH: 4:15pm, chicken sausage, poppa salad, 420 cal 

DINNER: 6pm, Vegetarian dim sum, +/- 700  cal

EVENING SNACK: 8pm, homemade brownie, +/- 200 cal
-----

BIKE CREDIT: 725 cal
WEDNESDAY COUNT: 3065

SLEPT: 10:30pm-6am,  7.5 hrs

AM SNACK: 6:15am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1: 10:45am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: noon, fruit smoothie, 450 cal

BIKE SNACK: 2pm, homemade granola bar, 300 cal

LUNCH: 4:15pm, chicken meatballs, steamed stringbeans, lentil curry,  680 cal

PM SNACK: 5:30pm, momma salad, 100  cal

PM SNACK: 4:45pm, poppa salad with dressing, veggie straws, 330 cal

DINNER: 7:45pm, burrito, poppa salad with basalmic, 1070 cal

EVENING SNACK: 8:45pm, bowl of c-chips cashews and pretzels, homemade brownie, +/- 700 cal

-----

THURSDAY COUNT: 2340

SLEPT: 10:30pm-2am, 4:30am-6:45am,  5.75 hrs

AM SNACK: 7am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1: 11:45am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 12:45pm, Fage with honey, vanilla almonds,  450 cal

PM SNACK: 2:45pm, momma salad, veggie straws, 230 cal

DINNER: 5:30pm, Ethiopian food, +/- 1000 cal

EVENING SNACK: 8pm, half a pint of ice cream, +/- 500 cal
-----

BIKE CREDIT: 1000 cal
FRIDAY COUNT: 2340

SLEPT: 10:15pm-6:30am,  8.25 hrs

AM SNACK: 6:45am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1: 11am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 ca

BREAKFAST 2: noon, steel cut oatmeal,  450 cal

BIKE SNACK: 2:45pm, granola bar, 320 cal

BIKE SNACK: 3:30pm, granola bar, 320 cal

BIKE SNACK: 4:30pm, potato chips, 440 cal

DINNER pt 1: 6:45pm, poppa salad with dressing, 150 cal

DINNER pt 2: 7:15pm, brick of Chinese, +/- 1200 cal

EVENING SNACK: 9pm, homemade brownie, +/- 300 cal

-----

WEEK 2/4

MONDAY COUNT: 2690
SLEPT: 9:30pm - 4am, 6.5 hrs

AM SNACK: 4:15am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1 : 10:15am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 12:30pm, steel cut oatmeal, 450 cal

PM SNACK: 2pm, beef patty, chicken soup, momma salad, 580 cal

DINNER: 6pm, lemon sole, roasted asparagus, poppa salad, 650 cal

EVENING SNACK: 7:30pm, popcorn, kind bar, peanut butter crackers, +/- 850 cal

-----

TUESDAY COUNT: 2410

SLEPT: 9:15pm-6am,  8.75 hrs

AM SNACK: 6:15am,  iced green tea

BREAKFAST: 10:30am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 12:45pm, Fage with honey, vanilla almonds,  450 cal

LUNCH: 3:45pm, chicken meatballs, steamed stringbeans, mushroom curry,  620 cal

PM SNACK: 5:15pm, momma salad, 100 cal

DINNER: 6:45pm, Stouffer's French Bread pizzas, poppa salad, 1080  cal
-----

WEDNESDAY COUNT: 2,445 cal

SLEPT: 9:15pm-5:30am,  8.25 hrs

AM SNACK: 5:45am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1: 10:15am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: noon, fruit smoothie, 450 cal

LUNCH: 3pm, poppa salad with dressing, bacon, 440 cal

PM SNACK: 5:15pm, momma salad, veggie straws,  230  cal

DINNER: 7:45pm, burrito, diet coke, 925 cal

EVENING SNACK: 9pm, peanut butter crackers, 240 cal

-----

BIKE CREDIT: 760 cal
THURSDAY COUNT: 2010

SLEPT: 10pm-5am,  7 hrs

AM SNACK: 5:15am, iced green tea, 150 mg caffeine

BIKE SNACK: 6:45am, homemade granola bar, 270 cal

BREAKFAST 1: 11:15am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

LUNCH: 1:30pm, petite steak and mash, pork croquette, bread, diet coke, ice cream, +/- 1000 cal

PM SNACK: 4:30pm, momma salad, 100 cal

DINNER: 6:15pm, shrimp & scallop stirfry, samosas and chickpeas over steamed string beans, half a pint of ice cream +/- 1000 cal

EVENING SNACK: 10:15pm, peanut butter crackers, 240 cal
-----

FRIDAY COUNT: 2490

SLEPT: 10:30pm-4am,  5.5 hrs

AM SNACK: 4:30am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1: 9:45am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 ca

BREAKFAST 2: 10:15am, bagel with creamcheese and lox, +/- 700 cal

PM SNACK: 2:45pm, momma salad, veggie straws, 230 cal

PM SNACK: 3:30pm, poppa salad, cheezits, 410 cal

DINNER: 5:15pm, fish and chips, hotdog, ice cream, +/- 1000 cal

-----

WEEK 3/4

MONDAY COUNT: 2740
SLEPT: 9:30pm - 5am, 7.5 hrs

AM SNACK: 5:15am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1 : 9:45am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 12:15pm, steel cut oatmeal, 450 cal

PM SNACK: 2pm, beef patty, chicken soup, momma salad, 580 cal

PM SNACK: 3:30pm, ice cream, +/- 300 cal

DINNER: 6pm, lemon sole, roasted asparagus, poppa salad, 650 cal

EVENING SNACK: 7:30pm, popcorn, peanut butter crackers, +/- 600cal

-----

TUESDAY COUNT: 2290

SLEPT: 9:15pm-5am,  7.75 hrs

AM SNACK: 5:15am,  iced green tea

BREAKFAST: 10:30am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 1pm, Fage with honey, vanilla almonds,  450 cal

LUNCH: 3:30pm, poppa salad with dressing, and bacon,  440 cal

PM SNACK: 4:30pm, momma salad, veggie straws, 240 cal

DINNER: 5:45pm, vegetarian dim sum, small cup of ice cream, +/-1000  cal
-----

BIKE CREDIT: 680 cal
WEDNESDAY COUNT: 2640

SLEPT: 9pm-5:45am,  8.75 hrs

AM SNACK: 6am, iced green tea

AM SNACK: 8:15am, school sausage patty, +/- 100 cal

BREAKFAST 1: 9:15am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BIKE SNACK: 10:30am, homemade granola bar, 365 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 12:30pm, fruit smoothie, 450 cal

PM SNACK: 3:15pm, momma salad, 100 cal

LUNCH: 4pm, chicken meat balls, string beans and lentil curry, 770 cal

DINNER: 8pm, burrito, poppa salad with dressing, 1125 cal

EVENING SNACK: 9:30pm, small amount of chocolate chips, peanut butter crackers, +/- 250 cal
-----

THURSDAY COUNT: 2980

SLEPT: 10:30pm-5:30am,  7 hrs

AM SNACK: 5:45am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1: 12:15pm, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

PM SNACK: 1pm, momma salad, veggie straws, 230 cal

LUNCH: 2:15pm, fried mixed perogees with side of kraut, ice cream, +/- 1000 cal

PM SNACK: 4:30pm, poppa salad with dressing, cheezis, 440 cal

DINNER: 6pm, roast chicken, zuchini, big salad, +/- 650 cal

EVENING SNACK: 9:30pm, streetzi, ice cream bar, +/- 500 cal

-----

FRIDAY COUNT: 2360

SLEPT: 11pm-6:30am,  7.5 hrs

AM SNACK: 6:45am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1: 9:45am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 ca

LUNCH: 1pm, Ikea meatballs and mashed, chocolate cake, +/- 800 cal

PM SNACK: 3pm, free samples of weird swiss chocolate thingies, +/- 400 cal

PASSOVER DINNER: 6:30pm, gefilte, meatballs, matzo ball soup, matzo with chicken liver, chicken breast and stuffing, potato kugel, a couple of macaroons, seltzer, shot of slivovitz, +/- 1000 cal

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WEEK 4/4

MONDAY COUNT:2640
SLEPT: 10pm - 6:30am, 8.5 hrs

AM SNACK: 6:45am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1 : 10am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 12pm, fage yogurt with honey, vanilla, almonds, 450 cal

PM SNACK: 2:45pm, beef patty, chicken soup, momma salad, 580 cal

DINNER: 6pm, lemon sole, roasted asparagus, poppa salad, 650 cal

EVENING SNACK: 7:30pm, banana bread, peanut butter crackers, +/- 800cal

-----

TUESDAY COUNT: 2050

SLEPT: 9:30pm-6:30am,  9 hrs

AM SNACK: 6:45am,  iced green tea

BREAKFAST: 11:45am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 3pm, steel cut oatmeal,  450 cal

LUNCH: 4:45pm, poppa salad with dressing, veggie straws,  340 cal

PM SNACK: 5pm, momma salad, 100 cal

DINNER: 6pm, vegetarian dim sum, small cup of ice cream, +/-1000  cal
-----

WEDNESDAY COUNT: 2575

SLEPT: 8:30pm-6:30am,  10 hrs

AM SNACK: 6:45am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1: 10:45am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 1pm, fruit smoothie, 450 cal

PM SNACK: 4pm, momma salad, 100 cal

LUNCH: 5pm, poppa salad with dressing, veggie straws, 440 cal

DINNER: 8pm, burrito, diet coke, 925 cal

EVENING SNACK: 9:30pm, small amount of chocolate chips, pretzels and cashews, +/- 500 cal
-----

BIKE CREDIT: 750 cal
THURSDAY COUNT: 1790

SLEPT: 10pm-3am,  5 hrs

AM SNACK: 5am, iced green tea, 150 mg caffeine

BIKE SNACK: 6:45am, homemade granola bar, 260 cal

BREAKFAST 1: 10am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

PM SNACK: 3pm, momma salad, veggie straws, 230 cal

LUNCH: 5pm, poppa salad with dressing, peanut butter crackers, 390 cal

DINNER: 8:15pm, korean pork & rice, summer rolls, +/- 1500 cal
-----

FRIDAY COUNT: 2750 cal

SLEPT: 9:30pm-5:30am,  8 hrs

AM SNACK: 6am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1: 9:15am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 ca

LUNCH: 11:45am, korean beef burrito, small cup of ice cream, +/- 1100 cal

PM SNACK: 2pm, momma salad, peanut butter crackers, 290 cal

DINNER: 5:30pm, fish & chips, hotdog, ice cream, +/- 1200 cal

Recharge, let go.

216.6-->216.4-->212.4

When I stood on the scale early Saturday morning, it read 218.4. I had assumed it would be a loss, I could just feel it, but the scale said something quite different. I laid on the couch and watched some mindless TV in the dark without paying attention -- should I be depressed? Why did I think it was a loss if it was really another gain? Is the ideology I've developed over the years from thinking and writing and living it turning out to be incomplete? Perhaps I have a health issue that is manifesting itself in weight gain despite my calorie reduction, exercise increase, and continuing shift from less sweets and carbs to more fats, proteins and vegetables?

I got up and peed, decided to jump on the scale to see if I just shed a half pound or so, just to make this report a little less humiliating. I was stunned to see it register a 4 lb loss instead of a 2 lb gain. Like a typical weight-obsessive, I got on and off the scale several times. When I got on a little quicker than before, -bam!- there it was, 218.4 It seems I forgot to let the scale tare itself. It was 3 in the morning when I initially weighed in.

It was that 30 minutes of doubt -- I wondered if I should get depressed, and instead I decided to start a new plan of action - see a doctor, listen to what is said, revise plan based on new evidence. Fortunately, simply by checking myself, things fell into place.

I have my share of faults, imperfections, issues, problems and eccentricities, but one of those things can be interpreted as a strength -- I'm always on time or early, whether it's arriving at a function or delivering work to a client. There is stopwatch always running in my brain, making itself known if things are falling behind schedule, letting me know the time whether I want to know it or not. It's not quite conscious, but when the pressure is on, it's not quite unconscious either.

Stepping on that scale and seeing a gain made me realize I've developed a new aspect of this stopwatch - because of the years of calorie counting, there is a constant calculus in my head that has been putting a check on how much I eat every day. The logs below have kind of become an afterthought of this process, to check myself. The last 2-3 weeks I've made a conscious decision to trust in this internal watch, loosened my hand on the grip, and indeed, I've eaten my way around comfortably, the system is functioning  - it pays attention to my real hunger, to how my brain is functioning, and ignores the child-like urges for more sweets, more food, the secure feeling of a super-full stomach.

Last weekend I spent 4 days in England, a holiday I've been taking every other year for most of my adult life. This was the first time I eased back on the eating, rather than going forward and cramming in a whole mess, giving myself holiday-permission. I still enjoyed the hell out of my traditional foods, just skipped a lot of the unnecessary snacking and extra beers. I left without the traditional queazy feeling in my stomach from all that extra. I left feeling pretty much as good as when I arrived.

It has been in this letting go that I decided to stop posting weekly -- I think I've said all I need to say in a weekly format. I will now focus on just one essay a month, to give it a little more original thought and usefulness, rather than just fill up space to make a self-imposed deadline.

Thanks to all of my 3 readers -- I'll check in with you in early May!

-N

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DAILY AVERAGE: 2355
A good average, pretty much where I want to be to lose weight for a while, it seems. Lines up with my continuous weight loss from '12-'14.
-----

MONDAY COUNT: 2460
SLEPT: 9pm - 5:30am, 8.5 hrs

AM SNACK: 5:45am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1 : 10:15am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 1pm, steel cut oatmeal, 450 cal

PM SNACK: 3:15pm, beef patty, chicken soup, momma salad, pickles, 600 cal

DINNER: 7pm, lemon sole, roasted asparagus, poppa salad, 650 cal

EVENING SNACK: 7:30pm, popcorn, kind bar, +/- 600 cal

-----

TUESDAY COUNT: 2110

SLEPT: 10pm-6am,  8 hrs

AM SNACK: 6:15am,  iced green tea

BREAKFAST: 10:30am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 11:45am, Fage with honey, vanilla almonds,  450 cal

LUNCH: 3pm, sauteed shrimp, poppa salad, 460 cal 

PM SNACK: 5pm, poppa salad, 100 cal

DINNER: 6pm, Vegetarian dim sum, +/- 700  cal

EVENING SNACK: 10pm, peanut butter crackers, 240 cal
-----

WEDNESDAY COUNT: 2870

SLEPT: 10pm-5:30am,  7.5 hrs

AM SNACK: 5:45am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1: 12:15pm, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 1:30pm, fruit smoothie, 450 cal

LUNCH: 3:45pm, poppa salad with dressing and bacon, 440 cal

PM SNACK: 5pm, momma salad, cashews, 250 cal

PM SNACK: 4:45pm, poppa salad with dressing, veggie straws, 330 cal

DINNER: 7:45pm, burrito, diet coke, 920 cal

EVENING SNACK: 8:45pm, homemade brownie, +/- 200 cal
-----

BIKE CREDIT: 825
THURSDAY COUNT: x

SLEPT: 1am-6:30am, 5.5 hr

AM SNACK: 7:15am, iced green tea

BIKE SNACK: 9:30am, homemade granola bar, 285 cal

BIKE SNACK: 10:30am, homemade granola bar, 285 cal

BIKE LUNCH: 11:45am, 2 slices of pizza, +/- 500 cal

LUNCH: 3:45pm, chinese food, +/- 1200

off to England.....

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TUESDAY COUNT: 1990

SLEPT: 10:30pm-6:30am, 8hrs

AM SNACK: 6:45am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST: 10:30am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: noon, Fage with honey, vanilla almonds,  450 cal


PM SNACK: 2:30pm, beef patty, tomato soup, momma salad, 530 cal

PM SNACK: 5:45pm, little snippets of chocolate gifts given to kids who wanted to share with me, +/- 200 cal

DINNER: 7pm, lemon sole, roasted asparagus, poppa salad, 650 cal
-----

WEDNESDAY COUNT: 2400

SLEPT: 9pm-6am,  9 hrs

AM SNACK: 6:15am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1: 11:45am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 1pm, steel cut oatmeal, 450 cal

LUNCH: 3:15pm, poppa salad with dressing and bacon, 440 cal

PM SNACK: 5pm, momma salad, veggie straws, 230 cal

DINNER: 7:45pm, burrito, diet coke, 920 cal

EVENING SNACK: 8:45pm, homemade brownie, +/- 200 cal
-----

BIKE CREDIT: 700 cal
THURSDAY COUNT: 1945

SLEPT: 11:30pm-4:30am,  5 hrs

AM SNACK: 5am, iced green tea, 150mg caffeine

BIKE SNACK: 6:45am, homemade granola bar, 285 cal

BREAKFAST 1: 10:15am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 11:45am, Fage with honey, vanilla almonds,  450 cal

LUNCH: 2:30pm, shirataki noodles with shrimp and mushrooms in oyster sauce, poppa salad with dressing, 550 cal

DINNER: 6pm, chicken parm and spag, garlic crostini, kale tomato panzanella, white beans in oil and bread, a little veal, water, +/- 1200 cal
-----

FRIDAY COUNT: 2710

SLEPT: 9pm-6am,  9 hrs

AM SNACK: 7am, iced green tea

BREAKFAST 1: 10am, steel cut oatmeal,  450 cal

BREAKFAST 2: 10:15am, apple/beet/celery/carrot/cayenne/cucumber/ginger juice, 160 ca

PM SNACK: 1:30pm, momma salad, veggie straws, 230 cal

LUNCH: 3:45pm, sardines and avocado on whole wheat toast, poppa salad with dressing, 650 cal

DINNER: 5:15pm, fish and chips, hotdog, hot fudge sundae, +/- 1200 cal